Bila orang kejut tidur buat bunyi "Mmm?!" konon-konon dah sedar.

Two years back emak told a story of her officemate who saw our family picture and wanted me as her menantu. Based on the picture only. Heh mak cik I sincerely think you were duped. Anyway today the mak cik held a wedding and right at the door we saw the boy (no he wasn't the one getting married but his older brother) sebab makcik and pakcik tengah amik gambar atas pelamin - kita orang datang lambat, pukul 2 keh keh nasib baik nasi ada lagi. I didn't want to go at first, because we went to the same couple's reception yesterday - bride's family - but since both parents and in-laws are friends of my parents, we were invited to both. My emak knows how I liked going to weddings so when I told her I'm rain-checking today, she fussed a lot and told me "it was just jokes what we told you before", "yesterday was my other friend and she will see that you didn't come to this one" maybe thinking I didn't want to go because of the story. She even waited until I was ready before getting out of the house when she usually got into the car first.

So we arrived at the wedding, and at the door the boy greeted ayah first, asking "oh ni dari Sungai Udang ke?" and there was this total facepalm moment when my ayah said "aah betul, kalau tak kita ni dah berbesan" and tunjuk ke arah aku plak tu adoiyaiiiii nak tutup muka dengan pinggan je rasanya. Tapi since my best ability is pretending not to hear i managed to grin straight-faced at him though embarrassment is like oozing out from our nostrils.

Anyway my parents didn't quite remember if that was the boy but I think it was him, he was there on my aunt's wedding when the story first got round and the lot of my relatives were like pointing me out and pointing him out - helluva lot of facepalm moments, I was totally hiding behind the bunga telur basket I was holding - and I didn't think he was cute at that time but today he was. Could be the effect of the pink baju melayu he wore today, and the fact that he bought his emak a Honda City. :D

But then he walked past our table as we were eating and I heard him dragging his slippers (? shoes? sandals?) on the floor as he walked and straightaway in my head a buzzer sound goes TEEEETTTTTT.

Iklan sekejap dari drama melayu.com bila Cikgu Aspalela (memang nama sebenar) datang ke meja, tegur2 mak and asked me "kenapa awak terlalu langsing?". Cikgu last jumpa saya masa saya darjah enam kan cikgu.

Kemudian sambung balik drama melayu bila nak balik and ayah nak berborak pulak dengan Anuar kot nama dia. Mak biasa la pegi buat collection kuih bakar kek tapai dan door gift. Dengar-dengar ayat pertama macam cakap pasal aku je hah jom belah dok kat luar dengan mak cik mak cik sedara diorang belah Perak ah hentam je lah janji tak dengar cakap apa hahahaha. Masuk dalam kereta ayah cerita si budak tu sampai sekarang belum nak kahwin lagi tunggu apa tak tahu. Mak dia tak jadi besan dengan mak sebab ejatti-chan lambat sangat habis belajar pastu sekarang dah gemok gedempol plak tu. Ok itu tambahan je kehkeh.

Baiklah seterusnya berubah setting sebab heroin picisan drama cliche pegi beli tiket bas nak balik KL kat Masjid Tanah. Bas Maraliner dah abis pastu pergi tanya Jebat, "he he heheeeeiiiiiii Hang Jebat!" eh taklah cakap assalamualaikum la kat pakcik and makcik angker kaunter bas Jebat Ekspres. Aah la pernah tak mereka tersenyum manis kepadaku. Haritu beli tiket Jebat pukul 4.30 konon nak balik awal sekali bas rosak pukul 5.30 baru bas sampai. Maka tadi aku pun dengan mangkuk ayun nye pergi tanya pakcik and makcik bas Jebat tu "Ada possibility bas rosak tak esok?" oh bila lakonan semula baru nampak kedunguannya. Anyway kena sound tiga empat butir kat kaunter tu jugak padan muka aku. Dialog termasuklah "mulut lancang", "beli bas sendiri" dan "mati ni kita tak boleh nak jangka". Walaupun macho rupa paras tapi hati menangis siapa tahu sob sob sroott srooootttt. Touching sorang-sorang dalam kereta selama sepuluh minit lepas kena marah.

Habislah kisah hidup pada 1 Muharam 1433H. By the way semua novel Melayu yang kubaca (kecuali Dear Yayah dan sewaktu dengannya) semuanya menceritakan kisah sepasang lelaki dan wanita yang pada mulanya tidak suka akan satu sama lain, namun berkahwin kerana sebab-sebab yang divariasikan jalan ceritanya. Kemudian lama-lama menjadi suka pastu ada lah drama dia tapi asasnya begitulah. Membuatkanku terfikir kat Malaysia ni memang ramai ke yang kahwin kontrak atau dijodohkan oleh mak ayah / wasiat dan ikut juga walaupun tak suka? Pelik saya.